It’s an illusion




The goal is to be the best person you can become, even after all the struggles in your life.

Today is a great day to start struggling for your goals, for all that you want to achieve in life.


Dear Readers,

Please find below a wonderful uplifting post from HealED. This is very uplifting and very helpful as we move towards new year. Go for recovery, go for life.




It’s an illusion


Do you ever feel like your eating disorder is actually giving something in return?
Perhaps some form of benefit?
Although, I hesitate to say it… in the beginning I must say I found being bulimic a little exciting.

For the first time I was allowing myself to eat a range of foods that I never allowed myself to eat.

I thought it was helping me control my weight, that it was my emotional outlet at times of stress, that it was my support blanket when I had nothing else to turn too.

And then I had a reality check. 

Lying slumped on the toilet floor, heart palpitating, head spinning, fearing for your life can do that to you. 
And that is what it all boils down to. 

The harsh cold reality was that my eating disorder was slowly killing me. 
Not just on a physical level either.  
It was chipping away at my soul, at my personality.
I went from being a happy, confident woman to someone who just wanted to hide away from the world each day and be alone with food – and lots of it!
I thought about nothing else besides food and planning my next binge spree.
I would plan how to dodge people I knew so I could get to the shops and then into my bedroom so I could be all alone to binge.

I used to envy people who lived alone, thinking they were lucky for having access to a bathroom without listening ears or people looking over their shoulder. 

My days were spent walking about in a trance, full of anxiety, full of paranoia.
I became absolutely miserable and my only release was binging and purging.

For ten years bulimia robbed me of my life.  
My point is there is nothing positive about having an eating disorder.
It’s an illusion that it gives you any benefit.
It just takes, takes and takes until there is nothing left. 

Yes, recovery is challenging, but living with an eating disorder is a LOT more challenging.

I receive a large amount of emails daily, the one that stood out the most was a lady emailing me telling me her gran is still bulimic at 83! She’s had it since she was 16! 
Behaviours don’t just change as we age, you have got to stand up NOW and make the commitment to yourself to say “enough is enough”… “NOW is the right time to make these CHANGES in my life.”

I have recovered and I have coached many people who have also recovered.
So I know it is 100% possible to make these changes.
It’s the best feeling on the planet to get your beautiful life back again.
This is why I always state that RECOVERY is your NO1 priority.

We only get one chance on earth, don’t choose to “trance out” on your wonderful years. 
A recovered life is a beautiful life,
YOU can have this. 
You CAN recover. 
Never let anyone convince you otherwise. Especially yourself 🙂

Your friend and coach, 


Ali Kerr Bulimia Help


About Author

Islam and Eating Disorders founded in 2012 – run by Maha Khan, the blog creates awareness of Eating Disorders in the Muslim world, offers information and support for sufferers and their loved ones.

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