Dear Readers,
I first came across Shaye Boddington several years ago. She was the first person I ever contacted for help and she was very sweet, very warm and very welcoming. Shaye struggled with bulimia for a long-period of her life. She’s now recovered and runs a successful on-line recovery program Bulimia Recovery for those who suffer from Eating Disorders. I received an E-mail from Shaye Yesterday about her pregnancy and I would like to share that with you.
First of All- Congratulations Shaye.
About Shaye
“I’m a 26 year old girl from Auckland, New Zealand and I consider myself one of the luckiest people on Earth. Nope, I didn’t win the lottery, my car isn’t flashy and I don’t have a career as a movie star…
But what I do have is a beautiful and simple life free from bulimia!
But it hasn’t always been this way…
Bulimia entered into my life when I was just a scrawny little kid. I was 8 years old and for some reason I decided that I needed to stay thin and that restricting my food – or throwing up – was one way I could achieve this.
As a child, bulimia stayed in the background of my life, only rearing it’s evil head from time to time. However, when I started getting a bum and boobs, my bulimia took off like a NASA spaceship on a mission!
Bulimia consumed many years of my life… It was my best friend, my worst enemy and my companion. I hated it but I didn’t know how to live without it.
In the 20th year of my life I had hit rock bottom…
I was binging and purging constantly and spending upwards of $15,000 a year on binge food (Good Lord – imagine all the holidays I could have gone on!) I was absolutely exhausted. I believed that if I didn’t do something about my bulimia soon, then it would be too late. My body was falling apart.
I had lived with bulimia for over 1/2 my life and I had no idea how to live without it… but I knew I had to…
I started by sharing my bulimia secret for the first time in my life with a counselor. It was a terrifying experience for me, but it was so important. The #1 thing I gained from talking to my counselor was that I felt like less of a freak. She didn’t judge me – so maybe I shouldn’t judge myself?
This revived confidence within myself and enabled me to start walking the rocky and uncertain road to recovery…
Along the way I discovered many strategies and tips which helped my recovery and many that didn’t. I abandoned those that didn’t help and walked forward with those that did.
At the age of 22 I graduated from university… but inside I was celebrating a far greater and more life-changing achievement…
I had beaten bulimia and I was never going back!”
It’s been over 6 years since I recovered from bulimia.
Me, Jan 2012 – Bulimia free
for over 6 years!
Bulimia is like a prison, it captures your soul and beats you down until you know nothing else besides the gray walls around you.
I’d be lying if I said that I never looked in the mirror and wished away little areas of fat… But those are passing thoughts now. They don’t rule my mind. They don’t drive me to the toilet (or to the shower, or to the back garden, or to the tupperware under my bed!) I accept them and release them. Then I remember how great life is because I am healthy and happy.
Life is wonderful because I am free from bulimia… 🙂
…and you can be free too! You can heal. You can recover from this eating disorder.
With the right support and advice, you can write your own future.
Bulimia Recovery is Real. You Have a Life Beyond This Prison.
Pregnant with Hyperemesis Gravidarum
Wow, it has been a long, long time since I wrote! This isn’t because I haven’t wanted to – it’s because I have been so sick for the past 8 months…
In January, my husband and I found out we were expecting our first little baby! I was nervous, excited and everything in-between 🙂 I started getting suspicious that I was growing a little bubba because I wasn’t feeling too well. At this point, I would have been about 3 weeks pregnant…
By the time I was 6 weeks pregnant I was vomiting constantly and had severe nausea that would last all day and all night. For weeks, I just lay in bed 24/7 accepting the suffering and thinking it was ‘normal pregnancy sickness’ but by the time I was 10 weeks pregnant, I was scared to be left alone because I felt like I was dying. It was at this point that I went to my doctor and I was diagnosed with Hyperemesis Gravidarum. Hyperemesis Gravidarum is severe pregnancy induced sickness that requires the same drugs used by chemotherapy patients to control such severe vomiting. Hyperemesis is something that I had never heard of and something that I definitely didn’t think could happen to me!
I kept hoping that the nausea and vomiting would go away by week 12 (that’s when normal morning sickness usually eases up) – but it didn’t. Then I’d hope it would go away by week 16 – it didn’t. week 20, still there… and on and on it went.
There were a few days here and there where I did feel a bit better and so I would try go off my medication – but that always ended with a trip back to the doctor to get checked for dehydration from excessive vomiting.
Anyway, here I am at 35.5 weeks pregnant! Thankfully, the last 10 days have been the best of my pregnancy… Only mild nausea and only a few vomiting episodes. I am starting to feel little sparkles of my old self coming back and it’s such relief!
Over the last 8 months, I’ve wanted so badly to keep in touch and to help and support you – but my life has felt like pure survival. I’ve just been doing what I’ve had to do to get by. If anybody reading this has suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum, you will understand.
I am so grateful that all the members of The Bulimia Recovery Program have been patient and supportive of me. I’m sorry I’m not able to offer the support in the community as I normally do – but it’s wonderful to see you all supporting each other when I do log in… Thank you for being so amazing and helpful to one another! I have joined a site that has a support forum for women with hyperemesis and so I realise more than ever how valuable getting support from people who understand truly is!
I am looking forward to my little monkey arriving and getting back into a routine of supporting you all each day! Apparently Hyperemesis Gravidarum ends as soon as the placenta is delivered, so that should be about 5 weeks away (plus a week or two to adjust to having a newborn!).
Well, I just wanted to drop you a line and finally explain my disappearance!!!
I also wanted to share that this experience has taught me (or at least reminded me) the value of having a healthy body and mind. When we are sick, life is hard. When we are suffering, life lacks that sparkle. It’s the same with any illness, disorder, addiction… including bulimia. You deserve to have a life that sparkles and so I hope you continue to push forward with your recovery… Keep looking for your answers. Reach out for help. Know that you deserve to do whatever it takes to regain your health.
Life can be so beautiful, and we all deserve that.
SO much love,
Shaye
Source: http://www.overcoming-bulimia.com
