Eating Disorders and Prayer/Salaat
Prayer clears the mist
and brings back peace to the soul.
Every morning, every evening
let the heart sing
La ilaha il Allah. There is no reality but God. Rumi
Trust in Allah, not in the Demon of Eating Disorder
…And whoever places his trust in Allah, Sufficient is He for him, for Allah will surely accomplish His Purpose: For verily, Allah has appointed for all things a due proportion. (Qur’an 65:3)
Dear Readers,
A reader asked me how does praying five times a day help you to recover from your Eating Disorder? Eating Disorders can be very debilitating for the person and their family. Before I went to Eating Disorder unit, I lived in a very delusional world, where I thought I was in complete control of my body and my mind. I prayed but I never prayed for the recovery. The only time, I realised , fully realised how severe my Eating Disorder was, when I was threatened with tube feeding and sectioning, that was the lowest point of my life. I remember coming home in anger and asking my father to take me shopping. I bought nuts, milk, butter, fruit, fish , whole grains and vegetables. I wanted to show my treatment team that it was me who was in-charge and in full control of my eating and not my Eating Disorder. One week later, I was in emergency with a slow heart beat and emaciated body. I then accepted defeat and bowed down to God in complete humility. I needed help and I needed help urgently.
I accepted defeat and I turned to Allah…..
Dear Allah,
I admit that I am powerless over my eating.
I admit that my life is unmanageable when I try to control it.
Help me this day to understand the true meaning of powerlessness.
Remove from me all denial of my eating disorder. (First Step prayer)
My prayer-
Dear Allah
Eating Disorder has siezed my life, my soul
and I am in pain . . . broken inside
control of myself and my life is gone
but, I pretend that I am still in control
fear, anger and grief live inside me,
pushing everyone away
isolating me in my prison,
a prison of regret, self-loathing shame and grief
I am stuck in the past . . . and I don’t see the future
presence is a struggle . . . and I can’t break away from this
prison. help me!
Next-Step for me was to ask Allah to release me from this slavery, to free me from this prison of dark world of Eating Disorder.
Dear Beloved Allah,
Release me from my prison of Eating Disorder
open my heart to love, blessings and life
open my eyes to see I can recover from my Eating Disorder
make me dare to be willing . . . to let go of my addictions
to let go of fear . . . self hatred . . .and shame
help me let go of this dark world of Eating Disorder
O Allah, come to me, I am your subservient slave,
I humbly ask that you remove all twisted thought & addictive
behavior from me this day,
awaken me . . . from this nightmare hell
Help my heart to know . . . that hope is possible.
After accepting that you have an Eating Disorder the next step is to put all your worries, fears at Allah’s hands. Prayer is the easiest way to reach Allah and to seek His help. Do bear in mind that not a single Eating Disorder thought that crosses your mind can be kept hidden from Allah, because He is closer to you then your jugular vein. Allah knows our illness and He knows how Eating Disorder is ruling our mind, so why not seek Help and guidance from the One who knows you very well?
If My servants ask you about Me, I am near. I answer the call of the caller when he calls on Me. They should therefore respond to Me and believe in Me so that hopefully they will be rightly guided. (Surat al-Baqara: 186)
Salaat/Prayer and Trust in Allah- To be a Muslim you have to follow the five pillars of Islam. The second pillar of Islam is Salaat/Prayer, praying five times a day to Allah. Prayer is a joy, a healing and brings us closer to God. Prayer creates a connection with God, it reinforces our dependency on him, and it leads to a heart at peace and a soul that worships.
In Eating Disorder, we want to be in full-control of everything. We either live in the past or look into future, there is no here, no present, because here/now/present is all a blur. In Islam we are taught to let go of this rigid control, to have tawakul/trust in Allah and to attribute all outcomes to Allah. I found it very difficult to establish this tawakul/trust in Allah when the demon of Eating Disorder was whispering all negative things in my mind. I really struggled to let go off my rigid control over my weight and my eating. At the Eating Disorder Unit, what got me through the stages of refeeding and weight gain was prayer/Salaat, where I would ask Allah to help me, to guide me to protect me from the demon of Eating Disorder. With the Salaat/Prayer the mist clears and you realize that there is a strong dietary and that it is He who is in full control and no-one else.
…And whoever places his trust in Allah, Sufficient is He for him, for Allah will surely accomplish His Purpose: For verily, Allah has appointed for all things a due proportion. (Qur’an 65:3)
Beauty Beyond Words-
It’s very difficult to put into words the merits of performing Salaat/prayer. I love how Hammudah Abd Ali Atti from islammessage.com describes the beauty behind the prayer:
When we analyze the Islamic prayer and study its unique nature, it will reveal to us that it is not merely a sequence of physical movements or an empty recital of the Holy Book. It is a matchless and unprecedented method of intellectual meditation and spiritual devotion, of moral elevation and physical exercise, all combined. It is an exclusively Islamic experience where every muscle of the body joins the soul and the mind in the worship and glory of God. It is difficult for anyone to impart in words the full meaning of the Islamic prayer, yet it can be said that it is:
1. A lesson in discipline and willpower;
2. A practice in devotion to God and all worthy objectives;
3. A vigilant reminder of God and constant revelation of His Goodness;
4. A seed of spiritual cultivation and moral soundness;
5. A guide to the most upright way of life;
6. A safeguard against decency and evil, against deviation and going astray;
7. A demonstration of true equality, solid unity, and brotherhood;
8. An expression of thankfulness to God and appreciation of Him;
9. A course of inner peace and stability;
10. An abundant source of patience and courage, of hope and confidence.
I pray to Allah for those struggling with Eating Disorders to be set free from the demon. Amen! Maha.
Download:
The Prophet’s Prayer- How Prophet Prayerd
